daringforever (daringforever) wrote in add_me,
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My own quintessence

Name: Nick
Sex: Male
Age: Mid 25
Location: Kaiserslautern area, Germany

Intro: I am an American romantic in Germany. For some of you, it is obvious as to why I am an American living in the Kaiserslautern area.

It was my dream to be here and my dream to travel, though it has made me realize that I never saw beyond my placement in Europe. I arrived here and almost instantly thought to myself "now what?" With that said, I have made efforts to make progress in my life. To better connect with people who I find to seemingly ride the same whimsical wavelengths I tread day to day. One of those efforts to make progress is placing myself on a binary broadcast here in LJ.


About Me:
- I have no religion, and I never bear misplaced judgment.  

- I have a mixed cultural background.
- Fitness (Bodybuilding, specifically), art, and music have been my drive for years.
- I haven't had a steady relationship in nearly a decade.
- I have two cats, which is probably a direct result of the previous statement.
- I get along with females more than I do with males.
- I have a mix of adventurous and introverted personality. (I love travel and activity, but I prefer it with few people or none at all within the immediate area. I love being inside my house as well, away from people when I'm not doing the things that I enjoy)
- My job and perpetual relationship status (despite my efforts) have caused me to find peace only in the end of the typical work week, a drink to forget and a drink to smile at the little things. As well as place more energy in Fitness, art, and music.
- I've realized that the prime of my years will be closer to 30, rather than the central 20s. Though my focus still remains to connect with certain others.
- I find peace in a quiet walk, being in the beauty of nature, isolated from others, or sharing it with someone who is close to me.
- My current goals in life still involve traveling to the coasts along the Mediterranean.

- I feel the most important thing I want to say is that I'm a sucker for love. I often feel that I am walking a metaphorical sidewalk, where I'm behind a chain-link fence, watching everyone race on the streets with their significant other. I can try to reach through all I want, though I can't join the racing speedway that is bursting with colors, lights, and sounds that can only be defined as love. A spectrum of life that I may grace just long enough to taste before it is ripped from me.
I've grasped a laundry list of subjects and lessons from the seemingly hopeless world of hurt, known commonly as love. I've come out of it with only a callused heart and soul. I am doing my best not to run in circles, but I feel I am doing so in believing that there is someone out there for everyone. Because after knowing a special someone and dating for no more than a few weeks before fizzling out, I constantly and continually question myself. The only common denominator is me, so I can't help but to ask... what's wrong with me?
At times I find a woman, and it's almost a hallucination where my imagination takes me. The world changes into radical paintings, pastels of sunshine break the monotonous nights, and I can taste the fury of my heart waiting to burst from my chest. And just as I think she is about to offer her hands to cup the emotions spewing from my heart, she instead pulls out a gun and shoot me through the chest, and it all spills to the ground.

What I look for in LJ: A place for my personality to take the forefront, to be the person I always tried to hide from myself and others. To embrace my voice.

The friend I look for in LJ: Just like a female who normally takes to male friends, adversely, I'm a male who has always taken to female friends. I've always had a friend who I find solace with, to be my security blanket, a place of resonating amenity. But within my year here in Europe, chapters have closed, and at the end of the day I have no one. I look for a female who finds relief in being an open book to a friend, as I pour it all just to have a place to stream my thoughts, and equally, I'd like to be the placement for their bullets and burdens. I take comfort in knowing that I could be a host of tranquility to another. Be it work, relationships, upcoming events, or anything else, I'd like nothing more than to be a voice in the daily discord of relentless gravity, a helping hand to pull someone from the regressions of life. At least then, if but for a moment in the plain of our existence, we can continue to walk forward... and not because we are a crutch for one another, but a part of ourself that sits in our subconscious, giving the strength we need.


I'd really enjoy a friend on here, I've tried LJ a few times to find a friend but to no avail.  If you maybe have a question or two to better connect, I'd be glad to answer. If nothing else... Thanks for reading.
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  • Hi!

    ✩ ✩✩ ✩✩ ✩✩ ✩Hello! My name is Pixel (she/her)! I'm a 32 year old. I don't quite remember my personality type but I'm an introverted…

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    Who is still active on this thing? I've recently been resurrected and I would like to actively journal again. I have had this journal for 18 years.…

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    Hello all, I have been a member of LJ on and off since 2008. In 2014 I went to paper journals, but I'm finding it hard to find time to keep it up.…